In preparing for today’s second installment of this Forget-Me-Not series, Jane talked about listening for the music in a eulogy, the structure that pulls all threads together in a loved one’s life. Her care in planning this series yielded a fabulous program today featuring Jane’s guest,
, author, celebrant, and guide. Peter’s unique perspective on the eulogy comes from the over 700 life stories he’s shared at these sacred moments.In his remarks, Peter shared how difficult it can be during a time of deep sadness and loss to find the right words to memorialize a loved one's life. While he eschews templates, he has found that prompts can help you think deeply—and specifically—about the important things to memorialize. “Specifics,” as he says, “can make all the difference.”
Peter was kind enough to share this booklet, which you can print out and explore independently.
References
As one who has spent so many years presenting the lives of others, Peter started out describing his own life and the loss of his father when he was just a teen. To characterize it, he referenced a 19th-century poem many of us learned as children:
Monday's child is fair of face,
Tuesday's child is full of grace.
Wednesday's child is full of woe,
Thursday's child has far to go.
Friday's child is loving and giving,
Saturday's child works hard for a living.
But the child that is born on Sabbath day,
Is bonny and blithe, good and gay.
Peter shared that he was born on Saturday. His father’s passing at such a young age meant that he had to end his schooling and “work hard for a living.” This is a poignant reminder of the harsh realities that shape our stories.
You can learn more about Peter’s work, insights, and Sundial series of podcasts at The Art of Memorialising on Substack.
You are welcome to share this post with friends and family. This recording and resources are shared free of charge after each program in our Projectkin community.
About this series
“Forget-Me-Not: How We Memorialise” is a six-part series for storytellers and family historians that explores how we memorialize and preserve the stories of people who have died. The series is a collaboration between Jane Hutcheon of The Juvenile Geriatric Newsletter and Projectkin.org, a community of family historians hooked on stories.
Jane Hutcheon is a Sydney-based journalist and the creator and former host of the ABCTV interview show One Plus One from 2010 until 2019. She is also a writer and performer in theater productions. In 2022 she wrote a show about my mother’s upbringing called Lost in Shanghai, and her latest show is Difficult Conversations with Jane Hutcheon. We’re thrilled to have this Forget-Me-Not series as part of Projectkin.
More about Jane’s concept for the series, and join us at an upcoming event!
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